There is a scene in Harry
Potter and the Order of the Phoenix where Harry walks into a room to
find Mrs. Weasley being tormented by a boggart. A boggart is a physically
harmless beast whose real threat is to rattle its prey emotionally. It is a shape-shifter, and takes the form of whatever it thinks will most frighten the person in front of it. Harry is astonished when he witnesses a boggart
take the form of each of Mrs. Weasley’s children, one at a time, laying before
her, cold and lifeless. As a horrified and confused Harry watches, Mrs. Weasley
sobs, completely debilitated by the thought of her children being hurt.
That detail of the book didn’t really impact me until I
became a mom. It brings me to tears now! If I was to come across a
boggart, it would appear to me as the cold, lifeless body of Big Brother or
Little Brother, and I, like Mrs. Weasley, would be reduced to a sobbing mess. In Harry's world, there is a magic spell that can easily defeat a boggart, but I don't have a magic wand here on earth.
Thankfully, my God is greater than my fears, and the real
way to fight off those “boggarts” is with the power of The Sword. It always
seems to come back to scripture memory for me. That is the only way I know to
fight against the temptation to worry over the fear of “what ifs.” I don’t say
that lightly. Several years ago, I was battling some pretty significant (almost
crippling) fear. It wasn’t unwarranted fear, either. However, I took my fears
to my pastor, and he gave me a list of scripture* that I could read and
memorize to help. It made a big difference then, and came in useful again more
recently.
Little Brother had a rough time after he was born. He was
in the hospital for ten weeks, and there were days when fear for his life and health gripped my heart.
I was shaken to my core more than once. I had to continually give Little
Brother back to the Lord (because I kept “taking the burden back on my
shoulders”). I reminded myself over and
over that no matter what happened, God is still God and He is still Good.
It was hard. Oh, was it hard! It is STILL hard to surrender the lives of my
precious sons to Him! Yet, how ridiculously prideful of me to think that they
are mine anyway! As if I was in control! And really, as I’ve mentioned before,
He loves them more than I ever could, anyway.
So every time fear raises its ugly head, I take up My
Sword and fight. No boggart is getting into THIS head!
*II Tim. 1:7, Isaiah 26:3, Psalm 50:15, Isaiah 12:2, Psalm 27:1, Isaiah 43:1-3a, Joshua 1:9
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